10 May 2011

Why we can't be friends

May 25 marks the end of Oprah's daily talk show as we know it, and the Associated Press reported this morning that disgraced author James Frey will appear on two episodes next week. You know, to talk about his feelings.

First impression: This trick worked way better with Franzen six months ago.

Second: It's not even that I'm mad at James Frey in particular (although in part I am, and in part particular; I suffered through BRIGHT SHINY MORNING for your sins didn't I?) It just smacks of the weirdest audience-pandery quasi-sweeps week agenda cooked up by a programming department who thinks America has a vested interest in seeing this thing resolved. Do we need the laying on of Oprah's hands? Is that just what we deserve? Surely no one was waiting for Frey to be officially forgiven.

(I say that, but I'm not at all sure.)

Third: Remember when Conan O'Brien was going off "Tonight" and he did those running gags about how much of their money he could spend in one gig, like the racehorse (fake) wearing the priceless fur coat (fake I assume) watching sports highlights for exorbitant rights fees (possibly real)? Why can't we just do some of those? Oprah already gives away stuff; why not just more stuff to mark her last week on network TV before jumping to her own channel?

Fourth: I probably won't tune in, but I would read a recap or a pause-laden transcript. Use that to gauge my interest. I still haven't read all of A MILLION LITTLE PIECES, and I still have no plans to now.


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