15 July 2009

"Instead of being saved from bad weather and a sprained ankle, this time it's from a giant octopus."

Via a Facebook friend: Quirk Books, publishers of PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES, will crash the release date for the new Dan Brown book with its latest mash-up, SENSE AND SENSIBILITY AND SEA MONSTERS, about "Elinor and Marianne Dashwood contending with giant lobsters, rampaging octopi, two-headed serpents and other ferocious sea monsters as they set out on their quest for love."

S&S&S will be co-written by Ben H. Winters, P&P&Z author Seth Grahame-Smith being occupied with the fictional biography ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER. I did not make that title up.

To follow up on the last list, here are yet five more classic novels that could be improved by adding zombies:

TOBACCO ROAD -- These sharecroppers are already ugly caricatures of Southern life; at least introducing a family of zombie sharecroppers would give you someone to root for.

THE TIN DRUM -- This year already saw the screen debut of zombie Nazis, so it's really a short hop to zombie Nazi-era self-inflicted dwarfs.

CATCHER IN THE RYE -- What were those children running from, anyway? Holden Caulfield was right when he said the people around him were phonies, but he should have been more specific as a survivor of the Zombie Wars of New York City. (Tomorrow on Wormbook: I am raided by the Salinger estate!)

PORTNOY'S COMPLAINT -- Because shiksas have been taking it on the chin for too long.

MADAME BOVARY -- Emma knows he's a zombie, but she's still in love with him, and his fragrant bite makes her thirst for something better than her bourgeois home. It's like TWILIGHT for married people.

1 comment:

Wade Garrett said...

The original was an inspired idea, but the pace at which competitors produce knock-off titles of their own absolutely astounds me. Even Franklin W. Dixon (or rather 'Franklin W. Dixon) would be impressed.