On The Internet nobody knows you're a Bushwanga

Finishing up the GROWN UP KIND OF PRETTY tour in Virginia, and last night a CRAPTON of hella-longtime-best-beloveds showed up, even though it was raining. It was so cool to meet people with WEIRD NAMES I KNEW. A pretty redhead said, “Sign it to Mit,” and I screeched, “Mit MOI????” And she was all, “Indeed.” It was like we were speaking a secret language.

This is why it is good to, on a blog community, not to call yourself Lisa, even if that is your name. It is better to be Michelle Who Is Shelley, or Leslie in Hiawatha, for examples.

This is why I have decided, when I blog stalk my next internetzian crush, to name myself in the comments, “Skunkpatch Bushwanga,” so that one day, when we do meet, I can say, “I am Skunkpatch,” and my crush can screech, “NOT SKUNKPATCH BUSHWANGA????” And I will modestly nod and blush and say, “The very same.”

--Joshilyn Jackson: book tour hero. I'll be right back giving my name as Skunkpatch Bushwanga at every Starbucks in the city.