27 September 2011

The greatest book-related missed connection ever

I hope this is real. Williamsburg, stop being so hip, you're killing us!

L Train reading Jonathan Franzen - m4w - 25 (Between Lorimer & Graham)


Date: 2011-09-24, 6:46PM EDT


I saw you on the L train yesterday. We made eye contact several times before the Lorimer stop.

You:
Were sitting under the metro map wearing Dark rimmed glasses.
You have short brown hair
a tattoo on the forearm, which I couldn't quite make out,
a plaid skirt with leggings on underneath and you were also wearing a belt well above your waist.
I noticed you were reading a Jonathan Franzen book. (Maybe The Corrections?)

Me:
I was standing in the door wearing a worn, blue Buffalo Bills T,
kahki shorts that are just above the knees,
dark-rimmed glasses, and sandals.
I have a poney tail, and am mostly bald on top.
Also, my socks had teddy bears on them.
I was reading George R. R. Martin's A Dance with Dragons.

After the Graham stop you looked me in the eyes and then readjusted your brassiere. In response I looked you in the eyes, and adjusted my member. You didn't respond to my initial response, and the gentleman standing next to me was a mexican who didn't smell so great, so in order to clearly identify my interest, and that I didn't smell bad, I leaned over you and pretended to examine the subway map. While leaning over you, I stuffed my hand in my pocket and readjusted my member again, in the hopes you would pick up my signal.

I was too late though, because you immediately had to get off at your stop (lorimer). Please contact me if you'd like to get some thai food one night, maybe come over and we could watch episodes of Dr. Who. Maybe if I'm lucky you'll let me play with your pumpkin.

1 comment:

8yearoldsdude said...

that does tip-toe the line between troll and real. I can't make a pronouncement